Developing resilience, overcoming obstacles and growing from setbacks is fundamental to happiness. Resilience is our capacity
Developing Resilience Overcoming and Growing from Setbacks
Learning to look at obstacles as opportunities to learn and grow. Resilience is also a commitment to meet our goals and carry out our happiness. The emotional stimulation of getting out of bed each day to reach our dreams. This commitment is what keeps us providing second chances in relationships and friendships. And it makes us avoid spending energy focusing on situations we cannot control. The key is to put our efforts where there would make the most impact. Excessive worrying about things we cannot control could leave us feeling helpless and lost. It is optimism. And optimism sees bad events as something temporary. Staying resilient help us develop a sense of compassion and looks for changes on how to overcome stress and deal with success.
My Personal History Developing Resilience:
During the past years, I learned many things about me. Many have always been here. Hidden stories were waiting to be discovered. The product of reality, maturity and life experiences. Have you ever walk around life with the undoubted certainty that you know who you are? But then one day, life makes you see yourself in a different mirror, and for the first time comes the discovery of what was hidden about yourself. I have lived in the skin of a pantomime that acted, smiled and moved like me, and the realization that I was discovering and honest version of me behind so many old masks.
After such discovery, I started paying attention to my body and found inches of skin unrecognizable before. I became a fan of my body: my neck, the shape of my mouth and waves on my messy curly hair. Location on each birthmark on my body, shapes, colors, even fingernails, brown color of my eyes, my tiny feet in comparison to my tall height, glow on the skin of my shoulders, blue veins, and body symmetric. I was getting to know and accepting myself as I am. Not as other people perceived me. And neither as my expectations, which sometimes are different from reality, but as I am and I loved my recognition. Before this discovery, I used to see my body as clothing sizes in need of going up or down, the amount of weight required to drop, muscles to shaped and body to tone. I saw my body according to how well the dresses in my closet fit in or not, and how tight the jeans were. I saw my body as a small or a medium size as a success, and a large number on the scale as a major failure.
But at one beautiful moment, I found invisible written words on my skin from each person that I have loved. Some of these words from the past at one point, gave me a scar and hurt me. Now, triumphantly disappearing with the daily renewal of my skin, self-love, maturity, and experiences. But, what I am most at peace now, is that If I see myself as a whole, I’ll be able to find beautiful words on each inch of my body from the many people who also love me unconditionally. But most importantly, from ME. I confess, at one point I was surprised to discover that most of these beautiful words came from my resilience. At some period in life, I gifted myself beautiful brave words and mantras, knowing that I was going to need them in the future. Similar to someone in the middle of the sea, lost in a shipwreck, sending SOS messages to a soul who would respond years later into the future. SOS messages of self-love, resilience, and validation. Words which transformed my endurance and made me brave in several situations.
These incredibly beautiful words are too many now. Becoming bigger each day and turning itself into the brightest light in any room. I accept now that my body is breathing intuition, vibration, and energy. No longer logic. No fixable-addictive thinking. Materialistic living and possessions do not satisfy my soul. I crave intensity, creativity, passion and spiritual connections. I was homesick my whole life, thinking that I was missing something or someone who I couldn’t find. When I became honest with my self, I discovered magically that I was no longer homesick. I found out that my missing home was in ME.
The original article was published and differently edited by SheKnows.com
How To Cultivate Resilience And Grow From Setbacks:
- Envision a brighter future ahead and keep a positive mentality.
- Make sure to stay surrounded by healthy relationships, which will support and motivate your decisions instead of constant criticism.
- Say no to the victim mentality. Focus your energy on improving what you cannot control.
- Exercises, sleep and keeping stress under control. A healthy body and mind will respond more efficiently to the many obstacles.
- Stay away from negative thoughts. Use positive daily affirmation and watch how you talk to yourself.
- Learn from mistakes, problems, and lessons. There is strength in the capacity to overcome and move past the difficulties.
- Work daily on self-love and confidence. When you develop confidence, you will move forward due to your inner strength.
- Stay flexible with changes.
The reality is that sometimes we are going to fail from time to time. Living means making mistakes and the need to grow from setbacks. We should not stop seeking our dreams; even at the risk of failing. Resilient means staying strong, through the lessons so we can move to do better and bigger goals. The power to overcome setbacks will come from resilience.
Incredible, but true. Time heals old wounds. I remember years ago when I took this photo. It now feels like a thousand ages ago. I remember my internal chaos and how my emotions were devouring me with unspoken words. This trip was the beginning of a painful healing. Now, I want to go back to this same spot. Sit on that boat. Get my feet wet. Laugh. And say “Thank you,” while I wink at the sky. Dear friend, if you are hurting before going to bed “rest but don’t stop.” It gets better, I promise. Much better than your old plans. But you need to keep investing in you only. Go for less to have more. It will soon pass.
All that my heart is seeking now is peace. The peace that comes while holding the right hands, building relationships with compassionate humans and become surrounded by beauty and art. All that my brain is needing now is to create something new. An idea. A project. A dream. My thoughts into a tangible object. All that my skin is searching is his touch. His agreement that we could fly higher together without control and chains. His acceptance to love me when I’m his hurricane and storm, but also when I’m afraid of my vulnerability and fears. All that my soul is wanting is a good vibration. That silent “feeling” that makes you sense and confirm things that you can’t touch or give a name.
The old souls call it “wisdom.” The realists call it the voice of “experience.” The scientists call it “energy” from the body. The sensible (like you and I) we call it “intuition.” All that my curiosity is opening are new doors. My dream career. A new office. A city that doesn’t sleep. My words on paper. A camera to capture the magic. Ambitions liberated without apologies. All that my comfort zone wants is a new place. Analyzing LESS the things that could go wrong. Concentrating MORE on the safe road that I could build myself.